Communication

I had a wonderful encounter with a beautiful soul yesterday. A lovely mare with a big heart and lots of willingness. However, the mare faced many limitations. Physical limitations and mental limitations. These limitations made it impossible for this mare to do many things. Even simple things. And yet, the mare's limitations were completely overlooked, and her poor person was being blamed for being unclear and not communicating properly.

It's so easy to just blame "unclear communication." We do it all the time. Instead of stepping back and saying, "Hold on, what is the real reason this isn't working?" we are quick to blame someone or something of being unclear or confusing; of being a bad commincator and lacking in the "good communication department." And what does "good communication" look like? Spurs, a whip, a different bit? Bigger aids?

How hard is it to ask questions, like, what limitations is the rider facing? What limitations is the horse facing? Is there a mental or physical barrier prohibiting the ask to be answered? Is equipment getting in the way, or is there pain, hunger, lack of energy, unregulated hormones, fear, uncertainty, etc.?

Good communication means open conversation with the horse. Giving information to the horse, observing what the horse does with that information, and then taking the information the horse gives us and using that information to benefit the horse and our relationship with the horse. It does not mean the horse just does what we tell it to do. If the horse is experiencing barriers in their body or mind we must address it.

If we are experiencing barriers in our body or mind we must address it.

Don't just blame "bad communication." Blame bad observation. All communication is good whether it makes sense to us or not. The horse knows what we want or what our intentions are, and it certainly knows what it needs. We must learn to know what the horse wants and needs and go from there. Then we can have the communication we desire.